49ers Unveil New 2012 Kit and Dance Routine

Smart drops bombs on Calypso

James 'Smartbomber' Smart last night unleashed a cluster fuck of singles as he consigned Calypso to their third defeat of the season at the hand of the 49ers. Not one of the Calypso bowlers could dislodge him as Smart, 34, secured his career best of 30 Not Out. All hail the new 'wall'. Rahul Dravid's got nothing on this boy.

The spirit of the 49ers

I prefer currants ...

The 49ers are looking to continue with their winning start to the season by whipping new boys, The Sultans of Swing, tomorrow at Hampstead Heath.

Already the oppo skipper has been engaging in some Ferguson stylee mind games, revealing how 'poor' his team is and pretending they don't really know what they're doing. Me smells a rat having just looked at some of their batting averages.

Stay tuned to hear how the 49ers get on

Questions linger over Prancing Pony's Kettamine use

With the cricketing world still discussing just how good the 49ers were during their opening game against Calypso, a French newspaper has once again asked questions about Adam ‘Prancing Pony’ Brichto’s well documented use of Ketamine.

In a batting performance that astounded all, Brichto kept the tail wagging with his defiant performance as the number 8 batsmen. With Graeme Elliott producing a master class in flamboyant play, it was down to the Pony to support him as he, Elliott, knocked up a not too shabby 39 (including a 6 to win the game … flash bastard).

As the (angel) dust settles around the pony’s hooves, questions are now being raised as to how he pulled off such an amazing performance. A previously unseen image of the Prancer celebrating his fine batting performance has now surfaced in France. France, the country best known for its embrace of sportsmen such as Lance Armstrong, has now called into question whether the pony should be allowed to play in this summer’s 3^rd tour.